Mon, Apr 20, 2015 3-minute read

After a period of absence, I am back to the writing board. Lot of things happening and I hope I would take some time to pen them here for future laughs.

I am sure most of us have used a pain killer spray. There are a quite a few good brands out there and we usually stock one called “Moov”. We don’t use it very often, but sprays are handier than the ointment tubes. Especially for me. I have noticed that every time I use the ointment, I need to pee almost immediately. And no amount of washing your hands can save your *** from getting a bit of ointment treatment that would leave it frigid for quite some time. So, sprays are definitely better.

But these sprays have their own set of problems. I’ll share a few anecdotes to what I mean. This was about 2.5 years back when we were still in Velachery. One afternoon, Noni was having a bad back ache and she asked me to spray some Moov on her back. And I did. Out of anxiety and care, I sprayed a little too much of the spray. Now, what can be wrong? Everything. She literally writhed in pain, couldn’t speak a word and was visibly unable to handle the whole thing. It took a good 10 minutes before she was able to speak. She was super pissed off at me, although I don’t disagree with her.  I should’ve been more careful.

About 3-4 months back, there was a similar situation. I had a back pain and Noni decided to spray me some Moov. Unfortunately, it was a new can and when she force pressed it a whole lot landed on my back. I for once understood what Noni went through on that other day. Its inexplicable. It pains, burns in the skin and yet is cool, you feel like throwing up and a lot more happens. It takes a good 10-15 minutes to gain posture. Amidst all this, I could not resist laughing. Because all this was extremely funny (painful, but funny) to me. I know I am in pain, but I also see why Noni reacted the way she did. Crazy funny. I was laughing hysterically and Noni was feeling very bad. She probably thought the pain was driving me insane.

Today, I repeated this. Not by choice, of course. I sprained my neck in my sleep y’day night. And I didn’t want Noni to spray me this time. Not because she’ll over do it (she won’t. after that we figured out the how-to-spray-without-aggravating-pain formula). So I did it to myself. All over again.

In a moment, my life flashed before my eyes:

  • I want to do x.
  • I do y.
  • I suffer extreme pain.
  • I laugh hysterically at myself.
  • I am back in square one.

Not bad. Although I’ll never be able to explain that to my kids without looking like an a**h*le.